A Journal for Those Stuck at Home

Dudes, If You Are Starting to Pee Your Pants, It’s Time to Do Your Kegel Exercises

For better or worse, masculinity has often been defined by a sense of control over things (and, sadly, people). Depending on the circumstances, it can be one of our shining attributes, like Usain Bolt’s mastery over his body (and time and space) to break the human speed record, Jimi Hendrix’s musical supremacy expressed in his blistering guitar solos, or the mental prowess of Albert Einstein (expressions of mastery, of course, also belong to women: vocalist supreme Maria Callas and brainiac scientist Marie Curie – to name but a few…). In many other cases, however, this desire for control makes us thick-skulled brutes. If you don’t believe me, head out to the club district at closing time and watch the male bravado fueled by alcohol to see the primitive brain at its worst.

So, on the topic of control, what happens when a man’s penis starts dripping like a leaky faucet? [INSERT NERVOUS LAUGHTER HERE] He often feels ashamed. After all, this may be a sign that he’s losing grip on his pride and joy — Pun intended.

My dad used to say “use it or lose it.” Sadly, prolonged daddy-brain has prevented me from accessing my memory of what he was referring to. Still, the adage aptly applies to learned skills, as well as brain function and the muscles in our body. If we don’t keep those muscles trained to contract, they grow weak, and, in some cases, stop flexing. The same goes for the pubococcygeus (PC) muscles that span the pelvic floor. In the 1940s, Dr. Kegel drew attention to the importance of both the muscles in the pelvis and the exercises that keep them taut to reduce urinary incontinence, particularly in women after childbirth. Women don’t seem to have any issues discussing the need to do Kegel exercises that help strengthen the muscles controlling their nether regions, as well as hold in place their internal organs. Perhaps masculine pride keeps us from admitting this hidden weakness in our drawers.

From the reading I’ve done, which truthfully isn’t that much, it sounds like having strong PC muscles helps improve blood flow in and around penislandia, which also ties into sexual function – all the better for those wanting a more intense and fulfilling experience in the sack.

Kegels are a different kind of exercise regime, and the beauty is that you don’t have to clear your schedule or get a gym membership to strengthen things up. You can do them while sitting at your desk, when taking a pee (clenching/releasing to start and stop the flow), or even while having sex.

So do as my father says and use it or risk losing it. Or, if you really want to get silly: a wiener flex a day helps keep the pee pee away. Sorry, I had to.

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